My mother is extremely even tempered. Even when she’s really mad or annoyed, she tends to not raise her voice or enrage. I take after my father who always sounds like he’s arguing because he raises the pitch of his voice during every discussion. I wish I was more like my mother.

I like the character of women who are refined and have beautiful personalities. They are so gracious and loving in how they present themselves. Sometimes they get pegged as brainless or mindless. After all, anyone who can’t express passion for something is probably a drone right? I don’t think so.

I think there is a way you can train yourself to behave and act in a certain way and yet still feel strongly about things. I have not mastered this art yet. I get so heated by the slightest things. As soon as I am attached to an idea or ideal it shoots through my veins and becomes uncontrollable. My voice goes up and my words stumble all over each other and I often sound like a totally crude man in a bar when I’m invested in what I’m talking about.

Sometimes I am able to control my tone but the majority of the time I’m cursing like a sailor and blurting out like a rabid animal. It’s not pretty. This year I’m going to try and re-work my behavior patterns and see if I can’t behave a little more refined.. at least some of the time.